A few weeks into the 'Special Human Interest Projects' that
I was working on together with my colleagues at office, I started developing a
weird feeling about cancer; one of the topics we were meant to cover.
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| Here getting sun kissed, i am at peace now. |
Since my puberty days, (gone are the years), I have always
had intense breast tenderness and a bit of enlargement towards my periods.
The pain of getting my bra off after a long day was and is always mild but noticeable.
I, however, didn’t give it much attention since it came for a week and wore away eventually.
It was uncomfortable but bearable. And so I trudged on with life.
In mid February 2020, the pain and soreness became quite
intense and driven by the much traumatizing data the reporter kept sending in,
my head couldn’t rest.
From watching whatever videos of “How I found out I had
cancer”, “Dealing with breast cancer” and more of the like, my nights had never
been long! I didn’t want to tell my close friends and family, for a few
reasons;
I didn’t know what and how to explain the feeling and two; I
didn’t want them to worry about me.
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| Because it's a Friday!! |
I remember telling one of my workmates that I needed to
touch some other woman’s breasts so I could compare to mine: the feeling and
how coarse the 'stuff' inside should feel.
After a few phone calls to my medic friends, Manzi Alfred;
God bless his heart, recommended a certain hospital where someone would help me
navigate through the initial process. I consulted the young lady named
Josephine and she said I could go to the hospital any time.
On a cold Thursday in mid March, I made my visit to the
government hospital. As expected, it’s an avalanche of patients coming in,
others leaving with sad pitiful faces. I got to the waiting desk and sat still,
careful of who sat close to, it being the Corona virus times.
After an hour of waiting, the doctor beckoned me in and asked
me to sit. The squeaky chair rendered me nothing but more tension before the
doctor abruptly told me to undress.
Much as I expected that, it was a whole new experience;
someone exploring my breasts, squeezing tight and loose all the way, asking if
I felt any pain on palpation. Of course there was a bit of pain!
A few minutes later, I answered some questions and she asked
me to go have both breasts scanned. It was yet another time for my 'girls' to
go loose from a flimsy sports bra that I had opted for that morning.
Lying on the small bed covered with a stuffed mattress, a
cold substance of thick consistency touched my skin, all the way to the now
hardened areola, and the scanning commenced. Feeling every bit in there, the
doctor turned the monitor to my direction so I could follow up with the
process.
Soon enough, he mentioned that some ducts in the breasts
were swollen..but not enlarged to cause harm. Hesitant to make any response, I
asked what the cause could be.
“Hormonal changes can bring about this, which is normal. I
don’t see anything abnormal so I might as well conclude that your feeling is
more psychological than physical,” he said.
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I don’t know if I liked or loathed that statement, but I am
certain it wasn’t a conclusion I hoped for. Nonetheless, I cleaned up, got my
blouse back on and paid the fee. Slamming the door behind me, I clutched on to my
report sheet that had a scan results photo attached to it and headed for the
long lonely corridor exiting the facility.
I took back the report to the physician who had handled physical
examination. She perused through the document and insisted I should do more
check up because she “clearly felt some funny masses in the right breast.”
She asked me to get back on Wednesday of the following week,
which is this very day. As I write this, I am seated on one of the long benches
in the lobby, waiting for my turn to go see the specialist. It’s been two hours
of waiting and the anxiety in me is flaring up.
This must be one of the days when I want to dive off to some
paradise but just won’t because I need answers and however long it may take, I
will handle the wait somehow. Hopefully, the results prove it’s nothing
serious!
NOTE: GOOD NEWS!
I wrote the above piece while in the hospital. I am glad to
say that I got the results after two other examinations from a breast
specialist and some other doctor who cared; they said “WHATEVER YOU FEEL IN
THERE, WE HAVE CONCLUDED THAT ITS NOT ABNORMAL AND WITH A FEW PAINKILLERS, THE
PAIN AND SWELLING WILL GO AWAY. THERE IS NOTHING MUCH TO WORRY ABOUT.”
Again, this is such a relief! TO GO BE THE GLORY. To all
those that called in, my dear workmates, family and friends, your emotional
support was and still is a treasure to me, Thank you!
To all the females, oh..and males too out there, don’t take anything light, if
your boobs feel a bit different from normal and the condition persists,
please take the initiative and go get them checked. I love y’all so much and I want
you safe. Catch you next time, Cheers to the good results.
